It's been 2.5 weeks since I regained my head. Meaning, 2.5 weeks 100% episode free. This has not been my experience for years and it's one I've been protecting, hence no blog posts. There are parts of my mind that worry if I enter into my mental health parts of life it could reignite all … Continue reading I have my head
Chris Chatterton These were my words as I entered my psychologist's office, I think I've only said them ten times max to my memory. Some issues came to light from the brute force anxiety attack I had after my session last Friday, and more mild one the week before. I realized how anxious I've been … Continue reading We Need To Talk
Sometimes looking back brings the pain. As I live it now, my life is one of conscious and continuous distraction. If my mind is off center, you'll find me always doing something to distract the mind. If no activities are available, or even when I'm doing them, there is a neverending stream of audiobooks, Netflix … Continue reading Reminded, Remembered
I was at the Taiyaki stand, ready for my weekly custard fish, plus bonus fish! Hannah's gone for the weekend with her grandparents! It's always been the cheat weekend over the last two years of our super diet, lifestyle change, but the excitement is gone. It's not special, I will have no extra pleasure in … Continue reading The Cheat Days are Missing!
InBody the Temptress The longing glances in the gym were on fire today. The woman desperately wanting, but having to resist the charms, the comfort, the solidity of the body composition scale machine. Three days ago on Sunday, I decided that I was no longer going to let an arbitrary number dictate my life. Yeah! … Continue reading Alexia vs The Scale
Imperfect! In Black Clover, there is a witch queen who, besides having scary levels of magic, also insists on perfection in every aspect of what she sees or considers her domain. To be imperfect can bring a quick execution or less dire thing like suspending a child locked in a cage for years to perfect … Continue reading Imperfect! Die!
Something has been hinted to me by my psychologist. Something I could not imagine would be possible in my life. It's the reversal of my habits for the last 19+ years. That I should stop weighing myself, or at least not so much, not every day or multiple times a day. Since I was a … Continue reading Flying Blind